Tuesday, March 18, 2014

I confess: I totally made up more than one science fair set of data. It's too late to do anything about it now, Mr. Lindstrom!*

Because I am currently in a measuring cycle of illness (wherein the doctors want me to record everysinglepiece of information about my illness numerous times during the day, and I hate it, and then I forget, or I am too sick, or I am too sore, or I just do not care at all, and I am tempted to just fill in all the blanks the way you would if you forgot to do your science fair homework and needed to some extra research done), I am going to hit you with a by-the-numbers post:

  • 17 - The number of prescription medications I am currently taking
  •  2.5  - The approximate number I think are actually doing something, maybe? Who can tell?
  • 0 of those are new drugs and 
  • 2 of them are for breathing, so that's good, anyways.
  • 86 - My average resting heart rate for the past month
  • 139 - My average standing (or post-standing) heart rate for the past month - That's just standing: God forbid I try and do anything over that because then
  • 175 - My average "I attempted to also stand for longer than it took for the pulse ox to read my pulse" rate for the last month 
  • 1 - Number of times I have left the house since the calendar read March
  • 0 - Number of times I have left the house since the calendar read March that were not doctors' appointments  
  • 3 - How many different strengths of antibiotics it took to kick this last sinus infection, probably because of
  • 5 - The number of sinus infections I have had to treat since Christmas
  • 17 - Books I've read in the past week
  • 1 - Books I've written a review of for Cannonball Reads in the past week
  • 0 - Reviews I've actually posted on Cannonball Reads in the past week
  •  17,000 - Number of excuses I've given to myself for not writing/posting any of the others
  • 14  - Number of people who have promised to come over/said "we should come over"/attempted to/said they would like to see me since the New Year
  • 4 - Number of people who have actually come over (and one of them is an infant, and the other a husband, so neither of them had much say in the matter)
  • 2 - Number of times I've watched the Veronica Mars movie already (Yay Kickstarter! Yay for getting first run movies delivered to your computer! Boo to computers freezing at P I V I T O L moments in the movie! (If you have seen it, think 'cars', fellow Marshmallows, and you will understand why I was so unhappy.) 
  •  1.5 - Number of days it took me to watch all 3 seasons of VM on Amazon Prime in preperation for the movie 

  • 6 - Number of draft posts I have written since I've published a post here, all incomplete
  • 5 - Number of Tumblr posts I have published for the whatshouldwecallfibro.tumblr.com I am a co-admin of, in the same space of time (because giffing is easier than writing, people)
  • (Currently most popular, by the way: For all of you chronically ill Whovians out there)
  • 63 million (approx.) - Number of times I have wanted to throw the computer and it's stupid Excel spreadsheet of numbers out the window since I have been symptom tracking
  • 3 - Different websites I signed up for because I thought they would help with the symptom tracking, only to bail because it was easier to Excel it myself 
  • 2 - Separate weeks my dad has been on vacation already this year, and I have been stuck in the house with him
  • 0 - Clues that he has that there is anything 'off' in our 'relationship' even though I have spent the better part of 
  • 2 - Separate weeks ignoring him as much as possible (When I had the sinus infection it was 0% possible, because I could not even find the kitchen, let alone make food.) 
  • 39 - Average number of hours a week my mom has been working at the retirement home for the past month
  • 100% - How exhausted this is making her & how much it sucks to still be the one who can't work, even though I'm 
  • 200% proud of her for kicking ass and doing so awesome (The old people love her, of course: They all request her and one woman told her she was an "angel on earth." But it's also seriously depressing, and even the stories she comes home with bring up all sorts of Grandmother-y related feels for me, so I know how tough it is on her.)
  • 16 - Other things I've got on my to-do list for tonight
  • 2 - Realistic count of how many of those things I might accomplish (eat/shower)
  • 0 - Cares I give that my to-do list will be carrying over to tomorrow
  • 100% - Realization that I should rename the to-do list the "Carried over from before" list, because it's more honest.
And finally:
  • 6:00 - The time, and that means more numbers to mark, more foods to eat, more pills to take, more things to cross of the list. 

*And I usually NEVER cheated, but ... I'm not going to watch this stupid thing for three months: I'm going to put it together a few weeks ahead of time - IF you're lucky.  My brother and sisters were all "do it the night-before-ers", so I think me occasionally fudging the data on whether or not cats and dogs are right and left pawed is not, so much, the end of the world.


Crazed Nitwit said...

I would visit you if I could. Sorry things are so hard right now. I detest excel myself. Love you!

The Goldfish said...

You have my profound sympathies. I saw a specialist occupational therapist last week - the first specialist I've seen in many years. And straight away we're onto quantifying the unquantifiable. Nothing this bad, but just the beginning;

"So would you say you're 5% on a bad day?"

5% of what? And I'm sitting there doing the maths (a healthy 33 year old should be able to walk a good few miles at a stretch, work an eight hour day - on a bad day I can do about 0.0001 of that).

Fortunately, I only have a week's "Activity Chart" to fill in now, and there aren't that many boxes.