I've been off ...

a bit this week. Who knows why? Brother and SisterN are on vacation, so the children's aren't here on Tuesday's and Thursdays, and my schedule is off, I suppose.

I've been worrying about a few tests the doc wants me to have, and obsessing about the fact that the schedule lady WILL NOT CALL ME BACK WITH THE APPOINTMENTS already! Seriously: I had the appt two weeks ago, when he told me to have one particular test, then I called Monday and Wednesday last week to talk to Zach, and then, after he finally got the message and called me back Wednesday night, I called on Friday, and again this Monday to have her make the appointment and call me back.

How do you not make a pest of yourself at such times? I fear calling over and over again, because I have nothing other to say than "Hi: It's NTE again, calling about the lumbar puncture?" At which point she quickly says "Right, I'll call you right back with that appointment." And then DOES NOT. I don't want to be a bitch, but, um... Hello? You're supposed to be doing this: it's your job. I'm never rude to you (although you have been to me in the past), and all I'm asking is that you make the appointment, and then tell me when it is... I'd do it myself, if I had the info-freakin-mation, but I do NOT, so please just help me out. (and get me this appointment before I chicken out .. I really don't want to have it, so let's get it over with already.)

This is one of those times that I wish I was a better health care consumer - I may have been dealing with chronic illness for about half my life at this point, but I still suck at being as assertive as I would like to/should be. It's a fine line, though, when you're dealing with doctors offices: I'm going to these people to have them stick a big needle in my back to collect fluid around my spine... I realize that it won't be the office person who'd do it, but ... still, you don't want to make enemies in doctor's offices. It's so weird how you can fear pissing these people off, because they're the ones who stand between you and the care you need. But since I hate talking on the phone in the first place, making this same phone call over and over and getting no help is making me nuts.

So there's that... but mostly, I'm just dragging. Draaaaaaaaaaggggging. And so, I've been trying to rest, read, and recharge a bit. Which, is kinda an oxymoron when it comes to people with CFIDS, but what cha gonna do?