Wednesday, November 03, 2010

"Monsters are real, ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win."*

This is my third attempt at this post - Damn: this truthiness stuff is hard!

I need to forgive myself for not growing up to be the woman I'd hoped I'd be. In so many ways.

I need to forgive myself for that one time I chickened out - for all the times I chickened out, held back, let myself be silenced; because it could have made a difference.

I need to forgive myself for forgetting important things, because it would have meant something if I'd remembered.

I need to forgive myself for not being truthful when it mattered most, because I hurt myself and some good people along the way.

I need to forgive myself for postponing things I don't want to face, because it always bites me in the ass.

I need to forgive myself for not answering the phone that night, because I couldn't have known.

I need to forgive myself for the times I only live a half-life, because I want to be more, be better, than that.

Oi, I have a feeling the next twenty seven days are going to be a tad more difficult than I had thought.

*Stephen King

Day 01 Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself


Crazed Nitwit said...

Let all that guilt go. Let it fly away. I have great faith in any and every thing you do. LOVE!!!

Sue Jackson said...

Wow, forgiving ourselves. That's a tough one. I know I tend to be harder on myself than I am on others. I hope your list helped you to let go of all those could-have, should-haves.