Happy Turkey Day!

After we built (tore down and rebuilt) a block city today, Lil Girl and I threw our own Thanksgiving Parade. Using all of the little people, birthday cake characters, and happy meal toys from our various childhoods (there's been a kid around here continuously since 1976), we wound up with a Sesame Street float, a Lion King float, a Lil Mermaid float, a bunch of clowns, a Bambi float, about 6 other Disney themed floats and had Woody from Toy Story leading the whole thing. Block City residents really seemed to enjoy, as did she and I. Afterwards, Lil Girl decided to invite every single float, wrangler and character back to the main house for Thanksgiving dinner. Here's hoping that your Thanksgiving has a few less participants, so that you don't have to rebuild your house (again) to fit them all in.

Today is pie day

and I have just two things to say -

1_ Baking pies is a LOT easier with a stove that works. *I will try to take pictures before they get eaten tomorrow.

and

2_I am in need of a hot shower and a warm bed.


Happy Thanksgiving Eve, peoples. Wish you all the best tomorrow.

Thank You

Last year on Veteran's Day, I posted a picture of my father , circa 1980 something, during one of his many tours of duty. He was in the United States Navy from 1978-1993 (? on the ending date), and it's one of my favorite pictures of him, even though I don't have any idea when/where he is in the picture. I was lucky enough to get the picture from three of his on-ship buddies when we met with them a few years back, & they couldn't remember where they might have been (although the consensus was that it was probably the Mediterranean). My father passed away 10 years ago, and our relationship was incredibly complex. But those men remembered him, and thought well enough of him to try to look him up 15-20 years after they had served together. They thought well enough of him to contact my brother, my sister and I and to arrange a meeting with us, after they found out he had died. They brought us pictures and stories and I will always appreciate them for doing it, because so many of my happy memories of my daddy have long been overshadowed by some of his more atrocious behavior during his last years on earth. Regardless of all that, though, I do know that he served his country well and that he worked diligently for many of his years in the service.

I have always been proud to be a sailor's daughter, even when I wasn't proud of the sailor himself. I have pictures of his burial at sea, a few pictures of him in his uniform, but instead I'm going to choose another picture that his friends gave us when we met them. Here he is in the tiny little quarters on ship, being a goof:



My family has a long history of service, actually: My Nana's father was in the Navy, and served during World War I aboard the USS Mt Vernon. Originally a seized German ship, the Mt Vernon was torpedoed by the Germans in September of 1918, while James (my great-grandfather) was serving. Although luckily uninjured, he was sent back to the US following the attack, and served at a Naval Hospital (which is, coincidentally, right around the corner from the new house) near Boston until he was discharged. Here is a photo of the ship's crew I found online - He's in there somewhere:



And here he is up close, in uniform:



My other maternal great-grandfather, (my grandfather's father) also served during what his discharge papers call "The World War" as a Wireman and a Private in the United States Army from 1917-1919. (Unfortunately I don't have any photos of him in his uniform, and actually only two or three pictures of him at all.) And his son, my mother's father, my Papa, served in the Army during WWII: All I know about his service is that he was a driver in a convoy going up the narrow mountain roads (in Northern Africa, maybe?) and the truck in front of him was hit, and drove right over the edge of the mountain. When he came back from the war, he never drove again. Here he is at the very end of the chow line (and not nearly as excited as some of his fellow troops):

On my father's side, three of his brothers served in various armed forces; all of my great-uncles and two of my great-aunts served during WWII (my Grandfather was the only child (of 7) who could not); Both of my Grandmother's brothers fought during the Battle of the Bulge - One of her brothers was a medic, and later told her that his biggest fear was that he would be running through the battlefield and be called to a soldier only to see it was his brother - thankfully that did not happen, and they both made it back safely; And the oldest American Veteran in my family (that I am aware of) was my great-great-Grandfather - my Grandmother's grandfather - who was killed in a flash flood after enlisting in the Union Army.

I'm lucky enough now that none of my uncles, aunts or cousins are serving any longer, but I can remember how scared I was during the first Gulf War, knowing that my father was over there serving. I can specifically remember flipping off the Nintendo one afternoon and CNN was on, and they were showing the live bombings, and I was frozen in fear, worrying that one of those fighting might have been my father, and that something horrible could happen to him. I cannot explain how much gratitude I have for those who are serving, and for their families. Today and always: Thank you.

Halloween Best Shots

I'm assuming that the majority of today's MBSM will be Halloween related, and I am so excited ~ I love to see all the costumes!

As for our Halloween, Lil Girl and Youngest Nephew came over early and spent the day hanging out with us... I miss spending time with Youngest Nephew now that school has started back up, and was so glad to see him. His sister was in a pretty nasty mood for part of the day (Sharing; what's that? Standing still so that Auntie can get a good picture: Que es esta?), and nobody understood my costume at all (Oracle; but nobody knows who the heck she is), but the majority of the day went well, nonetheless.




Youngest Nephew wasn't feeling particularly inspired this year, and wore his Army man costume from last year (and the year before), but with additional weaponry (yippee). Lil Girl was going to be a cat; then she wanted to be Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz (because it came with a little stuffed dog), but while we were at the store, she saw this Dora the Explorer costume and decided she had to be Dora - because of Backpack (who she calls "Pack Back") - Lil Girl is all about the accessories. (There were a lot of comments in our family, about her being a little blond Dora, but I thought she looked adorable... I do wonder how many people she had to explain the costume to, though.)

We had more trick or treaters this year, in our new house, than I've had in the past 5 years at the old house, and were lucky enough that we had a bunch of older candy hiding in the cupboard, or else we would have run out of candy before 7 o'clock.

Now I'm off to see what everybody else did this weekend!

"Has anybody seen my tambourine?"

Tim Curry is Halloween.

A lot of people have Halloween traditions that revolve around The Rocky Horror Picture Show, but I don't think I've ever even seen the whole thing. For me, Tim Curry has some films in his reperitoire that are quite a bit scarier:

Between It, which basically ruined my sister's childhood & ability to go to birthday parties without melting down (and which, sorry SisterJ, they are remaking :yay!) and my favorite nonsensical Halloween 80's throwback treat, The Worst Witch, there is plenty of proof that Tim Curry is an excellent actor, appropriately cheesy, and just a creepy, creepy guy.

Evidence: He hates orphans; he wanted the rainforest destroyed; he ruined the word "poppet" for me; he plotted to kill a king; and he did it all with a smarmy, oil-slick sneer. He can be funny, could be charming - No: he is charming - but at the same time, you can't kind of tell he wants to rip you to pieces as soon as you aren't paying enough attention.
This is a guy who just can't help it: He's creepy in two Christmas movies... and a Muppet movie, for goodness sake. So here's a little Tim Curry to get you in the Halloween Spirit:

Piddle ...

I'm listening to the traffic that follows the 4th of July spectacular here - perhaps you saw my across the river neighbors on the television? - and am glad to have spent this fourth here, at Grandmother's house. I know I've done (more than) my share of complaining about the fact that I am still here (66 days and counting), but that's only because I long for home. My bed, my things, my complete ability to not get dressed for 37 days in a row if I so choose home. The company here is splendid, overall, though, and I'll admit I may just have been in the place I needed to be tonight.

Because, since I've been sick, the 4th of July was something I did with Nana. With the rest of my family moving off to one rooftop or another to try to catch the best view of the fireworks, Nana and I would watch the Pops, mock the line dancers who couldn't hold the beat (could FIND the beat), and shake our heads at the fact that people needed karaoke words for Yankee Doodle Dandy. She would walk away in disgust as acts like Aerosmith "paraded around like pansies" or Big & Rich "screwed up even the Star Spangled Banner". I would tune her out or in, accordingly, waiting till she came back from her latest cigarette to tell her about the doofus with a really tall Uncle Sam hat. And she'd be settled in with her last hot cup of tea by the time the fireworks started, and she - who didn't really understand the point of special effects in movies or anything like that - would be captivated, would gasp and point out her favorites like any member of the crowd. It was something she didn't really enjoy in person ("too much smoke, people & bother," she'd say), but on TV, it made her face light up. It came back to me, all in a wave tonight, that she's not just at home watching without me, that I won't get to watch them with her again. And so, the tears then, and now, as I sit listening to the honking that she would've cursed, because it's still hard to know that.

Watching tonight with Grandmother & UJ was different - UJ was pissed at the people in the street who let their dog run loose, for one thing and so it was a bit tenser than usual - but it was good. It was happy. Grandmother didn't let the fact that she's not a singer stop her from singing along to the patriotic music (like I do), and she appreciated each extra sparkle and twinkle that the fireworks could provide, each time a little painted face came up on the big screen. It was good for me, and I think, good for them (I guess they don't usually watch: which - sacrilege!) I heard the stories of when they used to go to the fireworks, of when Arthur Fiedlder was leading the Pops, of the time my eldest cousin pouted all the way back to the car (because my uncle made them leave early to beat the traffic - I don't get that either).

I miss Nana - all the time, every day - but today was a little bit easier because I was here.

But here's a movie I introduced my Revolutionary-War-Lovin', 5th-Grade-Teaching Nana too, and a song, just for her.

I didn't even hear the Unicorn song

Nothing Irish happened here at all today. Although both Lil Girl and her daddy were wearing shamrocks, I never changed out of my (black) pajamas. There was no Irish bread (yuck) or even green mashed potatoes (yum). We are planning on corned beef and cabbage over the weekend, but we'll see if we get there or not. No green beer, no parades, no Dropkick Murphys. But there was also no school next door (Evacuation Day, don't ya know?), and so there was blessed quiet this morning, therefore, my St. Patrick's Day pretty pleasant.

Hope yours was great as well.

Pie baking day

AKA Thanksgiving Eve.

It's been a hard year here in the world of NTE, and I'm feeling it quite a bit as the holidays get closer and closer. But, that doesn't mean that I'm not aware that there are many things that I have to be thankful for. Tonight, I'm going to remember that I have a lot of people in my life that are vital & important. That they make the hard times bearable, the normal times valuable, and the special times extraordinary.

For those of you who take the time to read this please know that I'm grateful to have you, too.

Happy Thanksgiving, all.

Idea for the day

Some wisdom for your Wednesday...

"Buy Books for the Holidays is a collaborative blog that will showcase books, serve as a central point where we can all report our progress, give bloggers a chance to showcase reviews by genre, help people find the perfect book for that difficult or challenging person on your list, announce internet or bookstore specials, and raise awareness of literacy charities to promote a culture of reading in the future."

I'm totally on board...



and you should be too.

For all the Veterans in my life

May you have some peace today.

Things I don't get that other girls do...

(Part 1... of probably 1 billion.)

Valentine's Day.

I just ... don't get it.

I mean, I am a Card Person. Capital C, Capital P.

I know the location of 3 local Hallmark Stores. I know two of the salespeople at one store as more than nodding acquaintances (I may or may not know the names of their children).

I can, very easily, spend upwards of $50 (and 50 minutes) on choosing cards alone. I usually have a multistep approach to buying cards...
- Step 1: Pick up cards that I like, have a need for, may someday have a need for, or just plain want.
- Step 2: Try to keep a running tally in my mind of an approximate cost for the cards I am gathering.
- Step 3: About 45 minutes later, after having gone through each aisle of the store at least once, realize I now have enough cards to wallpaper my room with, and no freaking idea of how much they cost.
- Step 4: Realize that I cannot rob a bank in the next 15 minutes, which requires cutting the pile of cards in my lap down by about 75%.
- Step 5: Still spend about double what I had set out to spend, but walk away happy just the same.

If those steps get screwed with -- if I have an urgent need for just 1 card, for example, I feel disappointed that I did not get to loiter in the store for hours on end.

So I love cards. Hallmark commercials make me cry, I am sappy and sentimental and have a gooey chocolatey center. I celebrate St. Patrick's Day, and Grandparents' Day, and even sent a Friendship Day card one year (albeit totally by accident.

In short, I am the sort of person that seems tailor made for Valentine's Day Fever.

And yet, I have none.

I know what some of you may be thinking, but I am also not a Valentine's hater: a cynic, heartbroken at having spent her entire 28 years on earth Valentine free, set lose to terrorize the 'lucky few' out of their moonlit dinners and conversation hearts. (Well, I doubt that any of you are thinking that, but let's just say it wouldn't be the first time I ever heard that theory...)

No, I'm all for you having a great time if it means something to you... I just don't get it.

I like Valentine's Day parties in classrooms ... as you are reading this, children everywhere are sneaking business card-sized envelopes into the specially decorated desks of their classmates, eating cupcakes bedecked in pink sprinkles, or wondering at who could have possibly signed their card with a question mark. (And their teachers are shaking their heads at their naive belief that they might have actually accomplished any work today.) And, when you're teaching, any excuse for a party is welcomed ... but I don't get it: It isn't as if there are extensive curriculums set up that delve into the philosophy of love and it's many representations, or that there's a historical imperative to learn more about this wonderful patron saint of fainting, the plague, bee keepers and lovers (wow, I love being a Catholic!)... It's just, "Hello, it is February, and this is what we do in February."

I don't get buying roses when they're 3 times as expensive as they might be on any other random Thursday. Or heartshaped boxes of chocolates that are irresponsibly unlabeled (I hate those orange creme ones: why are they even in there??)

I don't get why single people have to feel lonelier on the 14th of this month than they would on any other mid-month (especially since, any other 14th day would not find them feeling particularly lonely at all). Or why couples should have to feel the pressure of adding a perfect night to their weekly routines. I don't get imposed happiness any more than I get imposed unhappiness.

I don't get how guys forget Valentine's Day, when it starts being everywhere right after Christmas, but I also don't get why it's so important that they should have to remember it.

It's just one of those things that I missed out on, like the need to buy shoes that cost more than a good camera.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm going to try to get back into posting: I've been missing it, and all of you.
My days are still very difficult: knowing the right thing to do for other people who are grieving, particularly my mum, is a hard, hard thing. Knowing what to do for myself is proving pretty difficult as well.

But I think we're all doing ok, and I'm going to keep thanking you all for all your help, just so you know how much I appreciate it. For now, I need to write again ... it helps me remember that there are other things going on -- in my life, and in the world -- and helps me feel more like myself. And I can use all of that that I can get.

MBSM: A Christmas Past.

Wandering around and seeing all the My Best Shot Mondays is a real treat for me, and pulled me (at least partially) out of my funk today. So I'll share a MBSM with all of you, of a happier Christmas..

Here's me, Older/Only Brother, & Oldest Sister/SisterS, Christmas 1984:



We're laughing at something crazy SisterJ (then almost 2) was doing, but I can't remember what it was. This was the year of the fake Cabbage Patch Kids - the kind with little bumps on the sides of their noses that looked like warts. The kind that you bought in pieces - heads, arms, legs, and trunk, and then assembled yourself. Trust me when I say that finding your grandmother's stash of doll heads by accident one year is plenty freaky, no matter how old you are.

Hey, this is pretty fun: I think, due to the cheering up aspect of this whole thing, I will try to do another one tomorrow ---> there's certainly plenty to choose from. Maybe I can find the one where my Dad is ready to punch out Santa, or Santa on crack, or find a year with authentic Cabbage Patch Kids... I know they're all here.

"And then

NTE fell asleep for a thousand years. And there was much happiness and rejoicing all through the land."

Which is a pretty good alternative to my actual life right now, so if there are any positions available in fairy tale land, please be sure to let me know.

Also... is anybody there? Did I chase you all away with all my whining & convoluted explanations (which would suck. For two reasons: 1) I like you all & 2) I'm not all that likely to stop venting here.) Or is everybody all caught up in the Christmas?


The Christmas seems to presently be evading us here at Chez NTE, given the heaviness of recent events/news, it's hard to be light and fluffy. I literally swore when a certain Christmas carol came on the radio yesterday - it felt so out of place to me it might has well have been June 29th.

My aunt is steadily improving, thank all that is holy. She's awake now, but we're still not certain what the issues really are. She's still very confused, but knew her sister enough to stick her tongue out at her, so she's starting to resemble her old self, a little, at least.

My Nana's biopsy results are due in tomorrow, but the doctor is pretty sure it's throat cancer. "Highly treatable, and usually curable" is a direct quote, but, somehow, the C word is so overwhelming that it's hard to see beyond it, just now.

We did have LilGirl today, though, and even though I was not in a place physically to be caring for her, I said screw it, because she cheers me up so much. It's nice to laugh at somebody giving a kissing parade, in the midst of all this crappola.

Also? For The Christmas?


I would like her coat, only with the furry part on the inside, because it is so freaking cute and snugly, I almost made her wear it around the house all day.

Tempting Fate (part 1)

It took me more than an entire day to find the energy/block the pain long enough to type this much, so I know y'all won't mind if this post comes in fits and starts... here's the beginning. But let me just say this so you won't worry too much: today, we are all making do. We are all pushing through. We are all, hope to God, getting better.

From Wednesday's Post:

Because of issues - health, family, other assorted craziness - tomorrow is not looking like the easiest day, but also it is definitely not our hardest, and that is something to remember.

Why, exactly, do I feel the need to tempt fate? Was it our worst day ever... no. I've had a lot of worse days. And, sadly, will probably have more in the close-future. But... it was certainly our worst Thanksgiving.

Which makes it a prize, because five or six years ago, my Thanksgiving was spent in bed, while the rest of my family went to my aunt's house. And while I did not miss the in-law who laughs like a hyena, scarecrow girl, or the constant smell of wet dog, I did miss the family, the dinner, the connection.

Three or four years ago, in the week coming up to Thanksgiving, the PUS decided to spread mothballs in our basement, and I had to evacuate. I spent the week leading up to, and that Thanksgiving morning, bunked on the couch at Grandmother's house, and eventually got home in time to have a Thanksgiving meal with one sister, Mum & I, all laying on my bed, watching The Grinch. (And, this is all without mentioning my usual Post-Holiday Flare.)

And then, two years ago on Thanksgiving my Grandmother (my father's mother) passed out on our kitchen floor and we had to call the ambulance. She left looking like a ghost, and my brother said as she did "I feel like I'm never going to see her again." Fortunately, he was wrong: she's still alive and in pretty great health for a 90 year old. But it was unbelievably scary, impossibly chilling.

But, somehow, this Thanksgiving beat them all.

Good morning !

Happy Thanksgiving...

I'm going to blog along with the parade for a little while, see how that goes.

- It smells good here. I may not like to eat, but these smells are pretty great.

- I love the musical numbers: I think we've talked before about how much I love Broadway...and, having never been there, it's awesome to catch some of the newer numbers right here from bed. Also, while I'm not a purist by any means, I'm hoping that next year there'll be some non-movie-inspired shows included. (Xanadu... blech)

- It does not bode well for the rest of my dad, drama-wise, that I started crying at the Michael Phelps commercial.

- I keep thinking "that's my favorite part of the parade." Favorite parts of the parade so far? The broadway kids at the beginning. The Rockettes...I could've been a Rockette (at least that's what I delude myself into thinking. )Some none favorites: the 'banter' with Al Roker...which are really just commercials for NBC shows.

- How cute was that Rudolph/Aflack commercial? I kinda liked it and kinda didn't: I don't like it when they take heritage type stuff and screw with it, but it was still funny, so I'm on the fence.

- I wonder what you have to do, who you have to be to get one of those seats behind the performers, at the Macy's Herald Square store...

- Also love: that the traffic light behind Matt and Meredith isn't off: 1,2,3 Red light. 1,2,3, Green light.

- Those toothtune toothbrushes are scary to me. Sending music right to your teeth (/brain)? uM... no thank you. It's a good idea, the 2-minute song thing, but the application seems freaky to me.

- Rockettes time! Yay! Did I mention that I could've been a Rockette? Well, thinking back... maybe/maybe not. When I was dancing, I was always the tallest, center of the line. I was also - am still - insanely flexible (Remind me to tell you about some of the theories that my FM may also be in the Ehler-Danlos family of connective tissue disorders). That led to a lot of high kicks. My dance teacher (who was petite... ok short) loved to show that I could kick high, and it was kind of a given that I'd be kicking high, doing splits, and stretching my long legs as much as possible. One year we did a Chorus Line number - One - and ended with those Rockette type kicks, as the curtain closed. We had to start out with 15 kicks, and then keep kicking as the curtain closed, opened, and closed again. The short people on the ends of the line only had to kick till the curtain passed them, breathe, and then wait for the curtain to come back to them. Me? I was dead center... kicking the entire time. I'm pretty sure we counted 31 additional kicks, after watching the recital video. And, mostly, they were eye-high. See... a few more years of training, and I could've been a Rockette.

- Why do they think that we'll think that these songs are being sung live? Well, actually, probably they are singing live, but that's not what we're hearing... We've all heard what live singing actually sounds like, and this ain't it.

- I should probably get dressed soon. Laying around in my bathrobe may be comfy, but it's not exactly company-ready.

- The family drama - for those of you who asked: it's freaking ridiculous. My aunt is on a respirator, her asshole of a brother (Mr. PUS) is making it all about him and creating ridiculousness, scaring my Nana, who's already scared out of her mind. And there's a restraining order involved and everything... It's awesome. That's ust the beginning, I'm afraid. So... I'm ignoring it for right now, even though my horoscope said to face things head on today. I don't wanna, and it can't make me.

- I have never built a bear.

- When she was like 9, I made SisterJ watch the tv-movie based on my favorite Stephen King novel, It and now she is afraid of clowns.

-I don't like - have never liked Hello Kitty.

- My high school marching band had about 25 people in it... and my high school wasn't really small. You can see how important it was to us.

- alright... am really getting dressed now... if I don't come back Happy Thanksgiving, everybody in the US. And to all of you who spend time here, however long or short, know I'm thankful for that.

Thanksgiving Eve

Baked a pie. Am now very sore and exhausted (and totally not listening to Dad rant and rave about how there was a blueberry stain on the table. Seriously: I do the best I can, and it takes a lot for me to try and pitch in like this... I couldn't keep an eye on everybody else at the same time, so you need to just lay off!) Almost forgot that I am supposed to post something before I take a loooooooooooooooooong hotttttttttttttttttttt shower, and let some things melt away.

Because of issues - health, family, other assorted craziness - tomorrow is not looking like the easiest day, but also it is definitely not our hardest, and that is something to remember.


My plan is to watch the parade in the morning --- YAY! I LOVE THE PARADE! - and hopefully post sometime then... But, in the hopes that you're having a fantabulous time and can't rush right over here to see what the hell I am talking about:

I'm going to wish you all the very best Thanksgiving you can possibly have...

MBSM - Illicit

Today's Best Shot Monday picture combines a few of my favorite things: the energy of Youngest Nephew (7), time alone with just Youngest Nephew, and the two of us acting like children - which, although he can do it all the time, is such a treat for me!

Here's an action shot from our sleepover this weekend, when I caught him catapulting from the couch to the ottoman, something the grown-up me would've had to get mad at (if only because it's not technically my furniture, and I know his Papa would've), but the fun & games me just laughed and showed him the picture.


I don't ever remember having this kind of careless, frenetic energy -



but it's still really fun to watch.

Happy Monday, all: If you're one of Best Shot Monday-players who usually only stop by on Monday's then ---> I hope your week is filled with things to be grateful for, and that you spend your Thanksgiving exactly as you wish.