June's Perfect Posts

This is my first month playing "Perfect Post" (through MommaK). I took it pretty seriously; everytime I read an exceptional post this month, it went into a special folder. Of course, that left me with a ton of posts to pick from this week.

I finally decided on WordGirl's post regarding world's sexiest men. I thought it was great: well written, funny, and true. And the pictures were enough to make you wish you'd forgotten to hit your biological clock's snooze button: Men with babies... Yummy. Congrats to WordGirl!!!

Here were a few of my runner's up:

Amalah's brave and honest post about some of the things nobody tells you about being somebody's mummy.

The Smartbitches take on some... less than fascinating comments about the differences between male and female readers.

Finslippy's horrid adventures in babysitting. (She certainly handled it a lot better than I would).

Miss Zoot who got me thinking about all the things I'm going to have to take back eventually.

Bonanza Jellybean's f_a_n_t_a_s_t_i_c, semi-political (lol) post winningly titledThe Sermon On Who You Should Mount .

And, just because it is my newest favority find, I'm going to stick WantNot in here. People, she is beyond fabulous. So far I have learned of a good place to buy printer ink for cheap, seen that there is such a thing as too much target (Check
this out), and wondered if maybe I don't need something else from Old Navy after all. And I've only been reading for about a week.

Thanks for stopping by... Hope you'll enjoy some of my picks.

We're working!

There is gladness throughout the land, as my laptop seems completely healed after our little splashing incident. We've talked it through, and I've made promises (that I probably won't be able to keep) regarding food and beverages in our workspace; I feel we've reached an amiable agreement... Laptop will not fizz, click or stop randomly, and I won't feel the urge to throw up every time I turn on the screen. All sides are pleased.

And to celebrate lovely laptop's return to the land of the dry and working... a special treat (in the form of a long meme). About Books.

Lovely, fabulous books.

A book that scared you: Scariest book ever? It, Stephen King: Pennywise the clown, the blood coming out of the drain, the sewers, Henry Bowers talking to the moon. It's one of my all time top 10 books, probably because it still (after about 15 rereads) really scares me.

A book you loved in elementary school: I loved the Ramona books in elementary school, as well as the babysitter's Club books, the Bobsey twins, Nancy Drew, All of the Anne of Green Gables books. And my first "adult" book - Gone with the Wind, which I found utterly entrancing. I read it three times, back to back, the summer between fourth and fifth grades.

A book you loved in middle school: For me, middle school was all about "Are you there god, it's me Margaret?" I also kept a close watch on the Sweet Valley Twins, the R.L Stine Fear Street series, and all the Stephen King books I could get my hands on. As a special treat, I'm going to add any book read outloud by our 6th grade teacher after lunch: The Indian in the Cupboard, James and the Giant Peach, Where the Red Fern Grows, The Secret Garden --- oh the joy of the SECRET in the Secret Garden. And my teacher had the best voice, a perfect sense of pacing: she kept 26 twelve-year-olds quiet and in their seats for at least a half hour every day.

A book you loved in high school: Nothing that was required reading, that's for sure... Except for poetry: High School sucked the fun out of a lot of things for me, but it was where I fell in love with the rhythm of Emily Dickinson, Whitman, Rossetti, and really found out that poetry wasn't all stupid dead people talking about posies: Mary Oliver, anyone?

A book you hated in high school: Oh, my god: Can we talk about Ethan Frome, please? How godawful boring was this book? It was all dullness and snow and bleakness and limping. And the movie version? Just as bad. I h_a_t_e_d this book so passionately. It was just pointless: "Look how drab and horrid life can be!" Well, yippee: I'm in high school, you think I don't know this already? (and Things Fall Apart by Achebe ... I was so lost, I thought I must have gotten the title wrong: I spent an entire summer obsessing over the fact that I had read the wrong summer reading book... Because they couldn't actually have picked this, could they?)

A book you loved in college: Oh, college led to many book-related discoveries: The Queen of Romance, Nora Roberts - just excellent writing and great stories that I love infinitely: they have become comfort food for my soul. I kept up with Stephen King, all the way through, and his Insomnia is some beautiful writing, with an imaginative storyline. I finally had an excuse to indulge my children's book habit while I was in school, too, so I got caught up in the Harry Potter series, fell in love with the artwork in Jaime Lee Curtis' Today I Feel Silly, and remembered just how great Good Night Moon actually was.

Your favorite "coming-of -age" book - I suppose I should say, The Catcher in the Rye, but I mostly didn't really get that book: I figured it was a guy thing. Joy School, Elizabeth Berg; I cannot recommend her writing enough. She's fantastic, and Joy School may be her best work (to date).

A book that made you Laugh: Long list here - Lambby Christopher Moore; anything by Jennifer Cruisie or Dave Barry; A.J. Jacob's The Know it All.


A book that made you Cry: there's a lot: I remember the first time a book made me just bust out bawling - I picked up whatever book was next in the Little House on the Praire pack I had, and it started "Mary was blind." WTF?!?!? How did that happen? Mary was just fine when I left her at the end of the last book! I started crying so hard that my mother thought I was sick.

Once I calmed down, I was more angry than sad: does anybody else remember the computer game Oregon Trail? It was a staple in a lot of classrooms in the late 80's - We played it every week at "computer class" on our Apple IIGEs at my school. We thought it was the ultimate in gaming: it is, of course, hideously obsolete now. Anyways, my point (did you think I even had one?) was that Mary turning blind was similar to that game: Somewhere along the Oregon Trail, you'd start to run out of food or water, and the people in your wagon would start dying. "Pa has dysentery" "Joe has died" - it always seemed pretty random to me. You'd be called upon to write their three word tombstone, when they'd seemed just fine to clicks of the spacebar ago.

My Little House experience was the same way.

Others that I can't read without tissues include: Little Women, Pull of the Moon, I'll Love you Forever & You are My Miracle (Heck, sometimes I don't make it through the card aisle in the store without Kleenex... you're lucky I'm stopping here).


A book that disgusted you: You know, I should have a billion answers for this question, but I try to block bad books from my memory. I guess my most recent intensely disliked book would have to be from the Anita Blake series by Laurell K. Hamilton. I know and like many people who LOVE this series, but it was really not for me.

Your favorite horror book: I mentioned this above, but It: The thing that grabbed me, as a ten year-old reading this book, was that King recognized that kids aren't stupid - in the book they are the only ones who really know what's going on. He saw that kids have power, and that evil targets them because of it.


Your Favorite Science Fiction book: I wonder what this genre consists of, really: the In Deaths by J.D. Robb are set in the future, they might count.


Your favorite poem/book of poems: I could never pick a favorite poem, and any collection I'd mention would have a variety of poets to choose from. Today's favorite poem might be from John Masefield:

An Epilogue

I have seen flowers come in stony places
And kind things done by men with ugly faces,
And the gold cup won by the worst horse at the races,
So I trust, too.

Your favorite biography: Tales from the Bed by Jennifer Estess. Reading other people's accounts of living with chronic illnesses is always a real double-edged sword for me: On the one hand it's such a reflection of what I am living through, it makes me feel less lonely; and on the other, it's so hard to be living it, to know that other people are suffering too. I found the Estess sisters' work both inspiring and challenging.

A book that challenged your imagination: The Harry Potter books. Yes, they're technically children's books, but I am telling you, people, these books are so rich and full, you won't even notice they're talking about teenagers. But they do have their own language: Muggles, Hufflepuff, and all that stuff. If you were out of practice reading about whole new worlds, these books really made you stretch.

A book that challenged your morals: Most of what I read in my ultra-Liberal school was challenging to the ideas of my family/parents. Since I had already decided that most of those ideas and opinions were wrong, I was perfectly happy to have other options. The names of most of these books are long gone, but I remember a lot of the content: mostly they covered all the inequities of our society. I just wish they'd have given me a better idea about what I was supposed to do to fix them.

A series that you love: I'm a bit of a series-holic, I'm afraid. Must buy's include the latest in the Stephanie Plum books by Janet Evanovich; in any of Nora Robert's series & her J.D. Robb's In Deaths; I loved the serialization of The Green Mile a few years back; obviously the Harry Potter series is also a favorite. My latest find is Eloisa James' Bridgerton series... must pick up Gregory's story ASAP.

Your favorite book not on this list: Some books that I didn't find a category for are America the Novel, by Jon Stewart et.al.; How to get your child to love reading by Esme Codell; & Cupcakes by the Cake Doctor ( I wish I could bake better, so? wanna make something of it???)

Books, my friends. Could there be anything better? (Like perhaps, a miraculous laptop??)

:)

Things not to do

Commit to blogging more often, and then splash water on your laptop.

Water...
On.
My.
Laptop.


People?!?!?

This was Saturday: I immediately shut it down, called CompUSA.

(Thank God for tech people!!! )

Turn it over ("like a roof") and let it be for a few days.

I peeked at it yesterday, plugged it in for a few seconds:

It seems to be ok, but there was a little splash of water (inside) coming from the corner of the screen. I decided it needed a few more days: the waiting is driving me crazy (as is having to come all the way in here, and SIT UP while typing... not good for Flaring NTE).

Anyways... I know I promised. I keep my promises. Here is a post... there will be more this week if I have to .. well, IDK what I'd have to do. But they'll be here.

Poor little laptop... It was the tiniest... tiniest tiniest little splash.

It'll be fine.. must not obsess. Must post and then rest.

:) I'll be back :)

L is for the way you Look at me... O is for the Only one I see....

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Had a little difficulty narrowing down my choices today: Love is so overwhelming, where to start? So, I went through some of my quotes, scrounged up some pictures, and this is what we've got to say about LOVE:




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Did you ever stick your arms out and spin and spin and spin? Well, that's what love is like.
Practical Magic

That's my youngest sister: SisterK spinning around. There's something about that picture, how free she is, that just tugs at my heart.


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"Sometimes it's better to put love into hugs than to put it into words." - Unknown


A grainy picture of SisterS & SisterM hugging, somewhere around 1988. SisterM is a lot less affectionate now, and this picture reminds me of a time when she could show us how much she loved us. I wish it were this easy now.



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So how does it happen, great love? Nobody knows... but what I can tell you is that it happens in the blink of an eye. One moment you're enjoying your life, and the next you're wondering how you ever lived without them. Hitch

My grandparents at their 50th Wedding Anniversary (in 1989). I can't imagine loving someone for that long, through all the trials that 50 years would bring, but they always made it look easy. My grandfather died 8 years ago this week - my grandmother once told me that living without him was like living without a part of herself: She still wonders what he would do, still talks to him in her own way. I can only wish for a love that deep, that true.
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To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. David Viscott





Here's Youngest Nephew, about 7 months old, in the Fall of 2000. There's lots of times I'm not really sure what I'm doing with my life. But one thing I never doubt: Being an aunt is the most special thing I have ever done. I am helping to raise some beautiful people.


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"I love this spot, it's like heaven right here on earth, maybe that's what heaven is, maybe we go through life collecting people and places we love and they become in our heaven " Here on Earth.

My Dad and Oldest Nephew, Easter 1999.





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"To be alive was to live in such a way that you were both of these people: the comforted and the comforting, the loved and the loving, so that finally all you were, all that you had lived your life to become, the sum total of each sunrise and sunset you'd ever managed to witness was to love. To live was to receive love, and to give it away." Brett Lott


This is my Nana and Only Brother, Christmas Eve 1999. It's just a perfect moment: somehow the connection between them was captured by the camera.



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"You don't ever have to do anything sensational to love or to be loved." Fred Rogers
Here's SisterJ (circa 1984) ending this whole thing with a big kiss for all of you!


Hope your week is happy... thanks for stopping by!!!

Let me explain something here

I am feeling.... Off.

It may be the fact that the air has turned to soup outside, necessitating the return of the dreaded air conditioners. I cannot breathe without the air conditioners, but I hate hate hate living with them. They are loud. Their droning makes it impossible to understand what anyone is saying if they are more than three steps away from you. We have to turn all the ringers back on the phones, making them loud enough to startle the sleeping baby (or the reading Auntie). And you have to close all the windows & doors (um... duh?), which makes me feel even more disconnected from the outside world.

It may be the fact that my stupid wheelchair broke - again. My chair is nine years old now: this fact depresses me immeasurably.

It was originally bought as a stopgap - a concession to my mother as I went away to college. I was firmly ensconced in my denial at the time: yes, I was crawling from room to room of the house. Yes, I was unable to walk three steps unassisted. Yes, I was frequently passing out and falling down. Yes, I had concussed myself more than once. No, that did not mean I would need a wheelchair to get around college. Why not? Because I did not want one. I honestly can't imagine what I thought I was going to do once I got to school, considering the fact that I couldn't even get out of the car on my own, but I was adamant: NO WHEELCHAIR! And then, my mum sat me down and pointed out all the things I already knew. She reminded me that I hadn't made it through high school without riding in an ambulance more than once (because of my falls), and wouldn't it be better to be the "girl in the wheelchair" than the "girl who crawls to the bathroom" or the "girl who we called the ambulance for again?" So I got a wheelchair.

And it has broken about 16 times in the past nine years (oh... There are stories there, M_A_N_Y stories... But, they're not today's). But does MassHealth (our state medicare, my only insurance) want to let me have a new one? No, they do not. Oh, they might wind up paying for it, but a prescription from my doctor? That's not enough. They need him to fill out this form, me to fill out that one. And the first 6 stores they told us accepted MassHealth? No longer do. The hospital supply store? Doesn't either. I could order it, and maybe, just maybe, this could take 6-8 weeks. What am I supposed to do in the meantime? I'm not quite sure, but you can bet that I thought twice before returning the wheelchair at Target the other day... then I figured I'd paid by check, and they'd be able to track me down.

It may be the fact that, since the baby was born, our whole schedule has been screwed up: Youngest nephew's Mum is on maternity leave, so we're no longer his primary afterschool care. But that doesn't mean they won't be over here: no, it just means we can't plan on him being here. They might decide to stop by, and stay till 9 at night. Or just pop in for dinner. Or a nap. I am a schedule type of girl (more out of necessity, really: I need to know when to conserve energy and when to use it up), this is really throwing me.

It may just be that I am, once again, fed up with myself. I'm sick of this whooole thing, and sometimes it just wears me out. I don't want to read, or eat, or watch t.v. - I want to be well (and thin). I want to go shopping and dancing or gambling or maybe be a contestant on Jeopardy (hell, if I'm skinny, I won't mind having my picture taken).

My horoscope said I would fall in love today "just for the fun of it."

I'm thinking it couldn't be more wrong.

Father's Day links

A while back, I started reading Kevin Smith's My Boring Ass Life. Being that his life is, of course, about a billion times more entertaining than mine, his writing is too. He talked about losing his dad in this post. It's a moving tribute to the kind of person his dad must have been (without venturing into the so-schmaltzy-this-person-can't-have-actually-existed territory).


Mom-101 brings us a Father's Day Reality Check. With her usual fine humor.

Over at Easy to be Hard (which is chock full of ... less than work acceptable... material) is this Groucho Marx Father's day song. Kudos to her, because I've been searching limewire for weeks, to no avail. Also, I don't know how to post music yet. So, go there instead.

And Townie Bastard
talks about one of my pet peeves - the lack of good Father's Day cards:

"The problem is, there are four kinds of cards that you can buy for your dad on Father's Day, his birthday, Christmas or whatever occasions. And these are the percentages of their availability.

1. A card with a fart joke involving your dad - 33%
2. A card with a golf joke involving your dad - 33%
3. A card about his inability/fixation with tools - 33%
4. Anything else - 1%"

Well, I got my dad one from the 1%, but still wasn't pleased with it. ("You could write a book about being a father/open/ And having pefect children") It's dumb, but my dad doesn't fish or golf; he's a fixer, but has no obsession with tools. My dad likes the Beatles; He's a fabulous cook; he has fixed the broken wheel of my wheelchair no less than 72 times. Where are the Beatles cards? The ones that don't make fun of his attempts in the kitchen? The heartfelt thanks cards? No such luck at Target yesterday.

Nobody in my family reads this blog - I like it that way, because then I can say what I want.

But if they did, I'd say thanks to my Dad.

Who I don't always get, but I know loves me.
Who didn't have to make this a family who doesn't really understand the significance of the word step- in relation to ourselves.
Who never said a bad word about my Daddy (especially since he had so much cause).
and Who I'll keep listening to, even when I know you're wrong.

And I'd say Happy Father's Day to Older Brother, who has impressed me no end with his ability to change. Who has never looked sweeter than when snuggling his baby girl. Who I only hope can remember how hard it was to be the older brother & help his son become the best.

And to my Daddy, Who I wish I didn't have to miss. Who has loyal friends. And who once showed me the zipper they put in his knee.

And to my grandfather, who called always called me his special girl.

(Sorry, I went into the schmaltz, didn't I? Oh well....)

Happy Father's Day, all!

SPH: This time... with pictures!

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When I saw the theme for this week's photo hunt, I was... less than excited. Sports and I do not co-exist peacefully. Although, if I were going to be technical, it's more specifically sports equipment and I that have issues.

That's because I have some sort of magnetic force that pulls sports equipment towards me. Had someone been reporting the sports that were occuring in my family, the copy would resemble this:

"Yesterday's baseball game was called after the ball was hit straight into the face of first baseman NTE."

Or "The metal bat got away from Only Brother, and, to the awe of all, flew backwards and took NTE down at the knees."

"Family outing ends in stitches for NTE when basketball hoop crashes down on NTE."

"Tennis camp money returned as NTE sprains ankle on another player's volley."

"Although NTE wisely decided not to participate in the yesterday's badmitton game, this did not prevent tragedy: Even though she was sitting a good 15 feet from the main action, SisterJ's racket managed to fly out of her hand, hitting NTE in the face and leaving a horseshoe shaped bruise."

I had no luck when it came to sports: you name a piece of sports equipment, I can show you the scars or tell you about the size bruises it can produce. Basketballs, footballs, hockey pucks & sticks. Lacrosse sticks, bowling balls, croquet mallets, volleyball nets.

So I, understandably, shivered at the thought of having to find some sort of sports-related picture for this post.

I shouldn't have worried, though. There were plenty to choose from, as I am the only one in our family thus afflicted:

Here's Only Brother, circa 1987, playing catch. Catch was a game I never really understood the point of. Watching a ball get thrown back and forth... and back... and forth... was just about as boring a thing as I could imagine. Yet the men in my family still find it enthralling. I'd rather read a book.









And here's some t-ball playing at Youngest Nephew's 6th birthday, this May:






Here's my personal favorite --> Water balloon fights.




A game where the equipment is supposed to hit you?




I bet you can guess who usually wins at that~

Happy Saturday!

I give up

... trying to add pictures to Saturday's post, that is. The pictures will NOT be uploaded; Blogger says they are and then? No pictures. So... I'm just going to pretend that they were there and move on with my week. Thanks to everybody who kept checking back --- I might try to sneak them into another post, just to see if that works. But not today, as banging my head against that particular wall is not my idea of fun.

With a few, very random thoughts.

1) I think my eyelashes are falling out at an alarming rate. I can't think of a reason that this might be true (unlike the time I tried a new drug and all my eyebrows immediately fell out), but it's true nonetheless. Every two or three hours lately, I am having to fish another stray eyelash out of my eye, where it is floating, poking me at odd angles. So, if say one eyelash every three hours everyday for the past week or two that's (math... I hate math...) 168 eyelashes in the past week. How many eyelashes does a person have, anyways?

2) Youngest Nephew is still having a very hard time acclimating to his new big-brother status. I finished reading Siblings Without Rivalry,

and now have to figure out a way to make my brother and (soon-to-be)sister in law read it too. I suppose the hardest part is that he has turned into a real brat lately, when we are all so used to him being well-behaved. It's a hard change for us to deal with, as if this little whining monster has been lurking beneath the friendly exterior all along. And now has come for an extended visit.

3)I have about a billion things to do, and writing blog posts should not have been #1. But... at least I can cross it off my list now, right?

Community = Games?

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This week's SPH turned out to be harder than I thought:

I was hoping to get out of the house and take some pictures of Prospect Hill Tower, which is were the first American flag was raised waaaay back in 1776:

January 1, 1776 is the date that made Prospect Hill famous. On this day, George Washington ordered that a new flag be raised on a 76-foot schooner mast placed on Prospect Hill. This "Grand Union Flag" was the first true American flag, representing the united colonies. It was raised with a salute of 13 guns and loud huzzahs by the soldiers. (from here)

Yeah, that didn't happen. But if you click the link, you can see it.
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So, instead, I had to rummage through older pictures, looking for something "community-ish" (I should copyright that). Here's what I came up with:


Community isn't just a place: It also means fellowship, sharing, group togetherness. And nothing brings my family closer than GAMES.



We are game freaks: We own at least 10 versions of Trivial Pursuit (I got 2 myself, for my birthday: SNL Trivial Pursuit & Book Lovers Trivial Pursuit). We rock at Pictionary, and have played Scattegories so often that we would pay BIG bucks for a new refill pack (attention Milton Bradley? Are you listening? NEW CARDS, Please!!!). A few of our newer obesessions are Loaded Questions and Clue Jr. (now that Youngest Nephew is old enough to play, we must start his indoctrination).

My favorite Uncle and his family lived in Virginia when I was younger. Every year, they would trek up here to visit. We spent an entire week playing games. I am not kidding: maybe, every now and then, we would stop to sleep. People would take little breaks to go get food, and then bring it back and we'd all eat. While playing. If we were in the car, on the way to somewhere, we played Uno. We carried TP cards in our pockets and asked questions at the park. Or in line at the movies. Or while pretending to go to sleep.

This is not to say that we are all good sports: the story of the Uncle who broke his pencil in half and then lobbed it at his partner in Pictionary is legend. Game boards have been tossed in the air, fist fights have broken out. Final outcomes debated for years after the actual game. Cheaters are NOT tolerated, and "helping" or "clues" are hit or miss - I personally hate them, other people, not so much.

In my family, the only time we are all together and DON'T attempt to get a game going is at weddings. And that's only because there are other people - those not related to us, and therefore without the obsessive game gene - there.

But my Mum will have some cards in her purse & I might have the portable cribbage board, so if you want to play a quick hand, you just let me know.

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ETA: This post has pictures, but blogger is not showing them. The status says they are "fixing" it... Hopefully they'll be up by the end of the day... So, please check back soon!

It's my birthday....

So I'm going to post whatever I feel like (as if I don't do that everyday):

First off? A birthday meme -
Go to Wikipedia and look up your birth day (excluding the year). List three neat facts, two births and one death in your journal, including the year.

June 5th is the day that....


in 1829, the HMS Pickle captured the armed slave ship Voladora off the coast of Cuba. How funny is it that someone named their ship the PICKLE?


in 1968 U.S. presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy was shot at the Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles, California by Sirhan Sirhan. (He dies on June 6). I don't know why Bobby Kennedy's death makes me so sad ~ the idea of all that promise wasted, I suppose. Although I was years away from being born, it's one of those things you can't help but wonder about - how different would the world be if it hadn't happened?

and in 1977, the Apple II, the first practical personal computer, went on sale. People, do we remember the Apple II? We had an Apple II GE (We may actually still have it in the basement.) It was the same computer we had in school, and I was a wiz on this thing. I mean, anytime a teacher needed a banner printed: "NTE, go down to the computer lab and print me a 'Spring is blooming' banner." Hokey dokey. Since those printers were so unbelievably slow, printing out a banner would take at least an hour. An HOUR out of class, usually with a friend, sitting in the computer lab like we owned it. And let me just say two final words on this subject - OREGON TRAIL, baby! Oregon Trail

These lucky people share my birthday:

Fabulous children's author/illustrator Richard Scarry. (Remember Lowly Worm?) He turned 60 the day I was born.

Hello, Marky Mark. We share a birthday: 1971 - Mark Wahlberg, American singer and actor. You are only 8 years older than I am... plus you still have your Boston accent. We have so much in common.

And, since they can't all be good, in 1956 Kenny G, American saxophonist made his earthly debut. Don't blame me.

This less lucky person died on my birthday:

The Velvet Fog, Mel Torme died in 1999. I'm not the biggest jazz fan ( I like my songs sing-along-able), but he has some very nice standards. But mostly, I remember him b/c of Night Court.
-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-`-

Here's some other tidbits I know about June 5th:

1) 6-5-79 was a Tuesday. In 1979, ABC's primetime lineup starred Laverne & Shirley . I was born to the sounds of: "There is nothing we won't try, never heard the word impossible, this time, there's no stopping us, we're gonna do it!" I suppose this a good theme song, but I'm having a hard time putting it into practice. (Plus, there is the possiblity that I was instead born to:"1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8 Schlameel, Schlamaazal Hassenpepper Incorporated," which is much less inspiring.)

2)This year, it's Whitmonday, which I've never heard of before, but apparently is Pentecost. Who knew?

3)It's World Enviorment Day, which is different from Earth Day how? But, hey, the earth and the environment can take as many days as they want.

4)Did you know that if it rains on the 5th of June, it means the blackberries will be small and full of seeds? I am not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing, as blackberries aren't exactly a staple of my diet, but it's drizzling here, so perhaps they may be medium sized?

and

5)June 5th is also Gingerbread Day. This makes about zero sense to me, as the only time people even talk about gingerbread is around Christmas. If I wanted to make a gingerbread house today, I doubt I would be able to find anything at the store with which to make it. But if someone dropped some off, I doubt I woudl complain. ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_

So that's what I know. It's my berf-day. I'm going to reallly attempt doing something fun. I hope you do too.... :)

Mirror Mirror...

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Today's theme is Mirror.

Yesterday was my youngest sister's (SisterK) Junior Prom.

Here's some shots of her make-up practice session with SisterJ










And she looked absolutely gorgeous last night...

(Side note here, people... when did pantyhose become unneccesary? Apparently no one wears them anymore? Not even to the Prom? :shrug:)

I hope she had a ball - & that all of you have weekends to match!



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Seperate side note - Speaking of mirrors, do you remember Poltergeist III? I watched it on cable last night, for the first time in quite a while. The whole Poltergeist trilogy scared the crap out of me: The tree coming through the window, the swimming pool full of skeletons, that scene with the tequila (from the first movie); Kane (from the second); and the all the mirrors in the third. In the third one the "They're Here" people try to get poor little Carol Anne through the mirrors. And the whole frickin building is mirrored: Mirrored hallways, elevators, bedrooms.

Now I figure mirrors are scary enough, without having to worry about whether or not I'd see this face behind me.

Anyway, I know it's pretty cheezy, but for some reason those Poltergeist movies still get me. And mirrors? Well, I"m totally staying away from them for now.

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I'm back...

and the doctor's appointment wasn't too bad. Not too much poking and prodding. Those next steps I was concerned about? Muscle biopsy. Oh goodie. Sounds fabulous.

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Found out tonight that Youngest Nephew (age 6) is NOT coping well with the arrival of his new little sister. Their Mum (SisterN) is worried b/c he's so aggressive with her, feels like she can't even turn her back, in case he tries to hurt her. I got all this second hand, when SisterJ went over to visit them tonight. I was like "Um... this is totally normal. She needs to just make sure that he knows he's not allowed to physically hurt the baby, and, at the same time, let him say anything he wants to about her - "I hate her, I wish you'd send her back," etc. SisterJ says SisterN is feeling guilty and overwhelmed and just horrible.

I feel horrible myself.

Because, I expect this to be a difficult transition for him. I expect him to act up and to be pushing at all his limits. And I just want to rush over there and fix things. To help her set boundaries for him, and not let her guilt get in the way. To show her that it really doesn't matter, that things will get better as time goes along. And it's not that I know everything, where SisterN doesn't. It's more that why should she try to do this mostly on her own? Brother's back at work now, so that leaves her with just the two kids . Alone. During school, just BabyGirl, but after 2:30, she's got them both. Alone.

I don't know... It just makes me physically ill to think of them all suffering over there, when I feel like I could be of some help. But if I offer, does that make it seem like ... "Well, I don't think you can handle this on your own, so let me tell you what I would do?" Is it like that --- I don't even know!!!


I am, however, sending a copy of This book over ASAP.


I can't decide if that makes me a know-it-all, pushy bitch or a concerned sister/auntie. I know I feel like the second, but maybe I come across as the first?

I just wish I could help them all.

Feeling: pooped. It's been a long day.

Night!

Some randomness

Have a doctor's appointment later today - must discuss list includes: My inability to get him on the phone &/or have him return my messages; WTF is happening here? I have no idea what the next steps in my treatment plan are supposed to be (mostly b/c he keeps changing his mind about which direction he thinks we should go in); & when will my next IVIG be, so I can plan around it.

I love this doctor - he is kind, listens well, & genuinely tries to help - but we are going on three years together, and I have made very little progress. I know there is no cure/ accepted treatment, but there's got to be something.

Also? I turn into a huge wuss at the doctor's office. It's embarrassing, but I have such a hard time just sticking up for myself when I am there. I go in with these mega-lists, but somehow he starts talking about something else, and by the time I think to get back to what I wanted to talk about, he's ready to move on. MUST BE MORE ASSERTIVE.
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We have ants (told you this was random). Those little tiny ones, that are really not dangerous, but highly frustrating and annoying. Mum is trying the non-smelly spray, but if this doesn't work, I might have to pack up for a couple of days, go visiting. Am not especially looking forward to this. I had to pack up right before my birthday last year, too, and missed my shot at any festivities.

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Speaking of - My birthday is rolling around again. On Monday. I'm supposed to decide whether or not I want to do anything for it. Telling people to leave any presents they may wish to give outside my door & go away is probably not an acceptable scenario.

I'm of two minds here -

On the one hand (maybe I'm of two hands? But aren't you always of two hands? IDK what is up with me today either), it is my birthday and I am still sick. This will be the 11th birthday since I've been sick. I missed out on the big Sweet 16 thing; never went out drinking on my 21st; haven't yet managed to get the energy/wellness level necessary to take the whole gambling trip my Mum & sisters promised me for my 25th. Big hooplas are beyond me. And even semi-small hooplas have huge repercussions: I don't want to be 'paying' physically for this one day with the next three weeks.

On the other - it is my birthday. And I am fed up of having to miss out on things b/c I'm sick. Maybe I'll have people come over and, claiming birthday privilege, hog the baby all day, or force people to play board games.

Hmm...
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Vat else?

Not too much. Must clean my room soon, as it is driving me insane. The clutter is multiplying and will soon attempt to swallow me, I am sure. (It's not actually too bad - it's mostly that I have a lot of projects to finish & no energy to do so.)

And that's all I know today.

Hope your Hump Day passes quickly & happily!

Saturday Photo Scavenger Hunt

Red ,
White,
& Blue


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Well, I just happened to notice that my brand new niece's (see previous post) hospital blanket was red white & blue...

















As is her big brother's soccer uniform...















And, just to round things out, their daddy, my big brother, almost 30 years ago, wearing a sailor's uniform, just like our daddy.

Have a great Memorial Day weekend, everyone!

And remember the fallen in your own way.

Baby Girl is Finally HERE!!!

Well, Youngest Nephew is finally a big brother - his sister was born Sunday, the 21st, at 7:03 p.m. She is healthy, and was 7lbs 15 oz, 20 inches long when she was born. And her parents did (eventually) come up with a very beautiful & sweet name for her ...

Unfortunately, I'm still not as comfortable as most of the blogosphere seems to be with posting real names & pictures. I'm getting there, as it does seem kind of silly to be using "code names" for my family, but I guess I'm a little bit too paranoid still.

But (even if I'm not yet willing to post her name), I can't deprive you of ANY baby pictures...













and LOOK at these little piggies....

A Flowery Sort of Post

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Today's theme is flowers. If we had any flowers around here, they have all drowned, because it has been raining for over a week. (The sun did make an appearance today, but mud is definitely the reigining theme outside).

So instead of real life flowers, I must again resort to searching through the pictures I've been scanning to see what I can come up with.

Be afraid.

Why afraid, you ask?

Behold:




What could that hideous pattern be? A couch perhaps? Wallpaper?

No. If only we could be that lucky.





It's a dress - a fancy one apparently, as my grandmother wore it to her daughter's wedding. I'll grant you that the wedding did take place in 1976, but could this ever have been fashionable?

Which is not to say that my grandmother didn't have excellent taste in wallpaper and couches. No, that doesn't prove that at all....

These do:

That's right folks... flowers and pigeons ...quail...pheasants, maybe? Some sort of bird, at any rate.

And, while she may have bought this couch in 1976, it's now 2006 and the couch is still in her living room.


Even better is that they inhabited the same room as
these curtains.















This picture ---that makes us all grateful that there wasn't color film in this camera (circa 1949)--- proves that bad taste was not limited to my gene pool (they're from my stepdad's parents).



There seems to be some sort of jungle flower wallpaper, and yet... the couch? It seems to be a completely unrelated, and yet flowery, pattern. I can only guess at what sort of color scheme this might work in.







And one last picture, which would probably have been better off in black and white, shows that perhaps, it might be best NOT to buy furniture that people will clash with no matter what they are wearing. These two flower patterns? We're obviously doubly blessed.


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So there's my bouquet for you today... I'm looking forward to seeing all your entries.

And a big thanks for all of your support last week. It really means a lot!

Not too much to report

I think I'm a bit behind here, but I have very little to talk about right now, and wonder at the idea of posting just for the sake of posting.

So instead, a quick round up of what I know (that you may or may not):

If you live in another part of the world/country, you may not know it, but Massachusetts and the surrounding areas? Are kind of drowning. Although I consider the sun to be an enemy of sorts (with my FM, comes sun sensitivity), it is awfully strange not to have seen any sign of it for more than a week. And the sound of rain on the windows, which usually is comforting, has moved past annoying. And schools have been closed on account of the rain. My grandmother, who's worked in the public schools here for more than 60 years, doesn't ever remember that happening before. Ever.


Thankfully, my family lives in areas where they've been mostly unaffected by the flooding (the hills of our city have to come in handy sometime), but I've missed a doctor's appointment already b/c there was just no way to get there.

Which adds a little bit of extra worry to my next tidbit - the fact that we are still waiting for my first niece to be born.

Most of the bets in the baby pool have already passed, and yet, no sign of baby. At yesterday's checkup, Mum & babe were both doing fine, and "can go at any time." The actual due date has been moved around so much, that no one's really sure if baby girl is late or just taking her time. I wouldn't mind so much if my SIL didn't seem so uncomfortable.

Here's a belly picture from two weeks ago....

Trust me when I say that it is much bigger now. And, while she looks incredibly cute pregnant, you can see how uncomfortable my poor SIL is.

But babykins is determined to take her time, and we're all just going to have to deal with that.

Having the hardest time dealing with that, is her older brother. Age 6, and previous only child. The bigger Mum's belly gets, the more frantic and agressive my nephew becomes. His buzzing is driving a lot of us very crazy, and even my fabled patience is starting to wear a bit thin.

And I have all the child development knowledge and experience that his father doesn't.
I know how hard a transition this is going to be for him, and have made some changes in my interactions with him(& suggestions for changes to others), but still.

Last week, he told us that we were "old & boring & mean" and he wasn't coming back the next day (we watch him afterschool).

I was "unfair" for making him eat his dinner & refusing to allow him to have dessert when he still chose not to do so.
My sister was "horrible mean" because she tried to talk to me about something that didn't include him.

I tried so hard to stay calm, but wound up telling him that, since he couldn't say anything nice to any of us, he should not say anything at all.

It was going home time, and I told him to get his shoes and coat. Of course, there was another round of how mean we all were. My mom said I practically shoved them both out the door, saying I hoped he'd bring a better attitude with him the next day.

I didn't exactly lose my temper, but I wasn't exactly keeping my cool either.

I'm trying very hard to keep in mind that this kid's entire life is changing & he doesn't know how to deal with it. We're reading lots of big brother books, and focusing on the things that will be the same & the things that will be different for him, but the waiting is grating on his nerves (more so than anyone else's - but SIL, that is) & he wants to "GET ON WITH IT ALREADY!!!"

Can't exactly blame him.

And tomorrow's his day in the baby pool, so he may just get his wish - and a couple of bucks to go with it, if he's really lucky.

Any suggestions for how to best help big brother? Most of the books talk about older siblings that are 2-4 years older than the new arrival, & 6 is a whole different place, developmentally. I'd love to hear any ideas or experiences you could share.

Keep your fingers crossed for baby girl, cuz they still don't have a name picked out, either.

Celebrating (of a sort)

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Today's topic is celebrating.

Well, I'm taking adding my own little twist here, because what I'll be celebrating this weekend is National CFIDS Awareness Day. (Technically, it was May 12th, yesterday, but today's the day I get the most traffic here, and I'd love to use it as best I can.)

CFIDS = Chronic Fatigue & Immune Dysfunction Syndrome.
People who suffer from CFIDS also have higher rates of
Fibromyalgia. Since there is a high rate of co-morbidity, May 12th (smack dab in the middle of National Arthritis Awareness Month) also happens to be Fibromyalgia Awareness Day.

Fibromyalgia & CFIDS are life altering, debilitating illnesses.
For which, there are no known causes or cures.
Treatments are varied and limited to management of disease symptoms, not the underlying issues.
Theories abound,
funding is minimal,
and the patients who suffer from these diseases are often misdiagnosed.

Public support for these illnesses - both because there is little known about them (at one time, CFIDS was dubbed "the Yuppie Flu;") and because of their belittling names (go here for a discussion on how much of a misnomer "fatigue" really is) has varied - although, as research continues to show a biological basis for the illnesses, the medical community, the media and the public seem to FINALLY be catching on to the horror of living with these diseases.

At the end of this post, I'm going to be full of link-y goodness for you to check out, so that, if you so wish, you can learn a lot more about CFIDS/ME. I hope you check some of them out.

But, since we're looking for pictures, here are some of the best CFIDS &/or FM related pictures I've found on the web:

These t-shirts are produced by various individuals and illness related groups,

& are all available for purchase from cafe press.


I hope they can give you some idea of what these diseases are like





And why it's so important



that we fund





& find



a cure

NOW.

A big thank you to all of those who've supported me during my battle with these dreadful illness: 12 years into this mess, and I wouldn't have made it a day without all of you. (Including my new blogging friends, who've been more supportive than I could've expected!)

And a special Mother's Day thanks to my mom. For more than I could ever say. (Now, if only she knew I had a blog...)
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Here's the link-y goodness I promised you:

Learning to Live With CFS: We Are Here, We Are Here! *

Laura Hillenbrand, author of Seabiscut, discusses her initial fall into illness

Autumn, a fabulous blogger, does her usual fabulous job of connecting the dots over on perfection on a curve. How many degrees away are you?

A good a reason as any for cake, right?

Support groups I've found helpful include But You Don't
Look Sick & SleepyDust.org

For More Information Check Out:

Co-Cure

The CFIDS Association

The International CFS Association

The Fibromyalgia Network

& The National Fibromyalgia Association.

Things I am not

1) Secretary = WHY am I the only one who can answer the phone here? Why is it that people can't tell their boyfriends that they aren't going to be home so that they don't call and ask me "Is J there?" or "Do you know what time M will be home?" No; No, I don't know. And what's more? I don't really care either. I am not in charge of their social calendars, nor do I want to be.

2) Walking dictionary = There are such things as dictionaries: They are books in which you can find the spellings and meanings of various words. Here is how you can tell the difference between me and them - I am not a book. And I will spit at you if you ask me how to spell something else today (unless you are 6: if you are six, I will respond kindly and help you complete your birthday thank you notes - but you must be 6).

3) House IT = Listen, I'll admit that I am semi-computer literate. But I don't know how to fix your 7 year old computer when it goes blue screen; we've already talked about this. And no, I don't really know how much memory you need to illegally copy DVD's - and no, you can't try it on my laptop. And, yes, I do know how to search the internet. No, I won't search it for you. No, I won't book your trip to some fabulous place that I can't go.

4) Thin = I tried on clothes today. It was horrible - I seriously considered trying on maternity clothes, as they were much cuter than the fat people clothes. Why are fat people clothes ugly? Old Navy has cute (ish) & comfy bigger outfits. But they are not dressy enough for a wedding. Which I have to go to TOMORROW!!! I will be wearing, who knows what. Parts of other people's old outfits, it looks like.

5) Happy = I am very conflicted about going to this wedding - on the one hand, I will see PEOPLE! Friend-type people! That I haven't seen in a while! On the other, there will be smells, and pain (during and post), and exhaustion, and meds to take that will screw me up even more, and just too many things to have to think about.

I can not simply GO to a wedding.

I have to think about all these stupid things that I don't want to think about.

I have to think about whether or not I will be able to breathe in a church full of flowers and people who forgot that perfume is not for bathing.
I have to think about how sore I will get sitting in my stupid wheelchair for more than five minutes, and how I will need to take meds before that will make me feel loopy.
I need to think about how much pain I will be in afterwards, how I won't be able to make it even to the bathroom for a few days, and whether or not it is worth all that effort just to see some friends.
I have to think about how depressed I will be if I talk myself out of going because some bad things might (ok, will) happen.
I have to think about What if the baby is born on Sunday or Monday or Tuesday and I am too tired to get out of bed? And I will miss my first niece's first day on the planet.
I have to think about why I am being so bitchy to people who haven't done anything except try to help me figure all this shit out.


6)Giving Up I know that this is just for today. This is just right now. I do not always feel this way. But tonight, it sucks.

BADD (part 1)

BADD = Blogging Against Disablism Day (which I missed, so this is my round up of everybody's FABULOUS posts!) Disablism, in case you don't know is discrimination based on illness/disabilites.


"What I wish folks would understand is that all human institutions and structures were built with a nondisabled population in mind. When people with disabilities ask for accommodations, they're just asking you to think about them, too." A more lawyerly perspective over at diability law.

Among the strengths of this text, the publisher touts, "a balanced perspective that reveals the diversity of American women." Or maybe this example of a "balanced perspective" reveals something else. More things I never really thought of regarding history & disability.

Angel Moon Art had some wit & wisdom I appreciated:Seems the hardest thing for any disabled person to gain access to, is not the library/cinema/shop etc.... but a little common decency and respect.
Anyone got a ramp for that????

Under the "why didn't I write something like this?" catagory -
But the interesting thing about prejudice to this group (of which I'm one) is that oftentimes disablism is mistaken for kindness

A theme that popped up quite a few times was that of daycare for disabled children.
Dream Mom had a particularly moving post on the topic


And I'm absolutely in love with a chronic illness bill of rights over at billiesdiary.

Ok, I'm really only about halfway through the alphabet here people, and I'm outta energy. I'll try to post some more tomorrow, but, if you get the chance, check out the whole list here.